Greased Lightning Round 2

#21 in your program, #1 in your hearts

 

1. Primetime tonight…It’s sweeps week for the NFL as their year-long reality show finally answers the question – Who’s got the best Mock-draft.0?  Only in ‘Murica is a labor force not permitted to speak freely to a prospective employer whenever there’s an opening.  One level below, that same workforce was free to accept any scholarship offer, but that’s just the kind of stand-in-the-way-business the NFL has been known for since ’35.  Besides, they know you’re gonna watch.  The only two reasons to watch; is to pretend you have any idea who your team should take and hope your team has a clue drafting that guy – or more importantly, like me, laugh at the pick the teams you despise just selected.  Yelling such low-brow things like: idiots!, hillbillies!, oh’yeah!?, and c’mere’a’minute.  Perfect for when the Broncos select a Kicker in the 1st round.  If you’re there next to that fan, look closely between your hysterical-hyena laughing, to notice they will begin to look like some sort of pig being eaten alive by meat-bats!

YOUR TEAM’S PICKS:

Dallas Cowboys — 27th (first round), 28th (second), 27th (third), 28th (fourth), 27th (fifth), 19th from San Diego (seventh), 26th from Baltimore (seventh).

New York Giants — 9th (first round), 8th (second), 10th (third), 9th (fourth), 8th (fifth), 10th (sixth), 9th (seventh), 28th from Denver (seventh).

Philadelphia Eagles — 20th (first round), 20th (second), 20th (third), 14th from San Francisco through Buffalo (fourth), 9th from St. Louis (fifth).

Chicago Bears — 7th (first round), 7th (second), 7th (third), 7th (fourth), 6th from Jets (fifth), 7th (sixth).

Detroit Lions — 23rd (first round), 22nd (second), 24th (third), 24th (sixth), 14th from Miami through Baltimore (seventh), 23rd (seventh).

Minnesota Vikings — 11th (first round), 13th (second round), 12th (third round), 11th (fourth), 1st from Tampa Bay through Buffalo (fifth), 11th (seventh), 15th from San Francisco through Miami (seventh).

Buffalo Bills — 18th (second round), 17th (third), 19th (fifth) 12th from Minnesota (sixth), 18th (sixth), 17th (seventh).

Miami Dolphins — 14th (first round), 15th (second), 15th (third), 13th from Minnesota (fifth), 14th (fifth), 15th (sixth).

New York Jets — 6th (first round), 5th (second), 6th (third), 5th (fourth), 6th (seventh), 7th (seventh).

Baltimore Ravens — 26th (first round), 26th (second), 26th (third), 23rd from Detroit (fourth), 26th (fourth), 37th compensatory (fourth), 22nd from Detroit (fifth), 35th compensatory (fifth), 40th compensatory (fifth), 28th from Dallas (sixth).

Cincinnati Bengals — 21st (first round), 21st (second), 21st (third), 35th compensatory (third), 21st (fourth), 36th compensatory (fourth), 21st (fifth), 21st (sixth), 22nd (seventh).

Cleveland Browns — 12th (first round), 19th from Buffalo (first), 11th (second), 13th (third), 12th (fourth), 16th from Buffalo (fourth), 11th (fifth), 13th (sixth), 26th from Baltimore (sixth), 12th (seventh).

Pittsburgh Steelers — 22nd (first round), 24th (second) 23rd (third), 22nd (fourth), 24th (fifth), 23rd (sixth), 36th compensatory (sixth), 22nd (seventh).

Atlanta Falcons — 8th (first round), 10th (second), 9th (third), 8th (fourth), 10th (fifth), 9th (sixth), 8th (seventh), 32nd from New England through St Louis (seventh).

Carolina Panthers — 25th (first round), 25th (second), 25th (third), 25th (fourth), 25th (fifth), 33rd compensatory (fifth), 38th compensatory (fifth), 25th (sixth), 25th (seventh).

Houston Texans — 16th (first round), 19th second), 18th (third), 17th (fourth), 16th (fifth), 39th compensatory (fifth), 19th (sixth), 35th compensatory (sixth), 40th compensatory (sixth), 18th (seventh).

Indianapolis Colts — 29th (first round), 29th (second), 29th (third), 29th (fourth), 29th (fifth), 29th (sixth), 31st from Seattle (sixth), 27th from Dallas (seventh), 38th compensatory (seventh).

Tennessee Titans — 2nd (first round), 1st (second), 2nd (third), 1st (fourth), 2nd (fifth), 1st (sixth), 32nd (sixth).

Arizona Cardinals — 24th (first round), 23rd (second), 22nd (third), 24th (fourth), 23rd (fifth), 22nd (sixth), 24th (seventh), 39th compensatory (seventh).

St Louis Rams — 10th (first round), 9th (second), 8th (third), 20th from Philadelphia (fourth), 39th compensatory (sixth), 10th (seventh).

Seattle Seahawks — 31st (second round), 31st (third), 13th from New Orleans (fourth), 31st (fourth), 35th compensatory (fourth), 31st (fifth), 34th compensatory (fifth), 5th from Jets (sixth), 33rd compensatory (sixth), 38th compensatory (sixth), 31st (seventh).

Denver Broncos — 28th (first round), 27th (second), 28th (third), 34th compensatory (fourth), 7th from Chicago (fifth), 28th (fifth), 27th (sixth), 33rd compensatory (seventh), 34th compensatory (seventh), 35th compensatory (seventh).

Oakland Raiders — 4th (first round), 3rd (second), 4th (third), 3rd (fourth), 4th (fifth), 3rd (sixth), 4th (seventh).

Washington Redskins — 5th (first round), 6th (second), 5th (third), 6th (fourth), 5th (fifth), 6th (sixth), 5th (seventh).

Jacksonville Jaguars — 3rd (first round), 4th (second), 3rd (third), 4th (fourth), 3rd (fifth), 4th (sixth), 3rd (seventh).

San Diego Chargers — 17th (first round), 16th (second), 19th (third), 18th (fourth), 17th (fifth), 16th (sixth).

Tampa Bay Buccaneers — 1st (first round), 2nd (second), 1st (third), 10h (fourth), 26th (fifth), 32nd (fifth), 8th (sixth), 2nd (seventh).

New England Patriots — 32nd (first round), 32nd (second), 32nd (third), 2nd (fourth), 32nd (fourth), 2nd (sixth), 1st (seventh).

San Francisco 49ers — 15th (first round), 14th (second), 15th (third), 27th (fourth), 15th (fifth), 14th (sixth), 29th (seventh).

New Orleans Saints — 13th (first round), 31st (first), 12th (second), 11th (third), 12th (fifth), 11th (sixth), 11th (seventh).

Kansas City Chiefs — 18th (first round), 17th (second), 16th (third), 19th (fourth), 18th (fifth), 17th (sixth), 16th (seventh).

Green Bay Packers — 30th (first round), 30th (second), 30th (third), 30th (fourth), 30th (fifth), 30th (sixth), 30th (seventh)


 

 

2. Daddy says dice are wicked!…For the truly degenerate, here are some prop bets for the NFL Draft tonight/weekend…I’ll talk with my attorney and see who he likes, maybe post his picks later…

  • Who will be the No. 1 selection (Bovada)

    Jameis Winston (-1000)
    Marcus Mariota (+350)
    Any other player (+1200)

    Who will be the No. 2 selection (Bovada)

    Jameis Winston (+500)
    Marcus Mariota (-300)
    Dante Fowler Jr (+1000)
    Leonard Williams (+700)
    Any Other Player (+500)

    Marcus Mariota will be drafted by the Titans (Sportsbook)

    Yes (-140)
    No (EVEN)

    How many teams will trade up for 1st round pick on Day 1? (Sportsbook)

    Over 2.5 (-400)
    Under 2.5 (+270)

    Draft Position: Amari Cooper (Bovada)

    OVER 5.5 (+200)
    UNDER 5.5 (-300)

    Draft Position: Kevin White (Bovada)

    OVER 7 (-120)
    UNDER 7 (-120)

    Draft Position: Todd Gurley (Bovada)

    OVER 12.5 (-120)
    UNDER 12.5 (-120)

    Draft Position: Melvin Gordon (Bovada)

    OVER 22.5 (-120)
    UNDER 22.5 (-120)

    Draft Position: Dante Fowler (Bovada)

    OVER 3.5 (-200)
    UNDER 3.5 (+150)

    How many Running Backs will be drafted in the 1st Round? (Bovada)

    OVER 1.5 (-500)
    UNDER 1.5 (+300)

    How many Wide Receivers will be drafted in the 1st Round? (Bovada)

    OVER 5.5 (-140)
    UNDER 5.5 (+150)

    How many Quarterbacks will be drafted in the 1st Round? (Sportsbook)

    OVER 2.5 (+300)
    UNDER 2.5 (-450)

    Mr. Irrelevant: Last player drafted will be (Kickers = Offense / Punter = Defense):

    Offensive player (-105)
    Defensive player (-105)


3. It’s dignity! Gah! Don’t you even know dignity when you see it?  The Grizzlies take care of the ‘Blazers – the Hawks held off the Nets – will the Bulls escape the Bucks and can we please have 7 games with the Spurs and Clippers?  I will watch the NBA tonight more than the draft, because there is this thing called Twitter that I can get the info I need about the NFL, or just read about it tomorrow – because what I want tonight is a Clippers win.  I want 7 games.  I’ll take a Bucks win too, just to see Chicago choke.  Just like the Detroit s#*^Wings!

 

Greased Lightning Round 1

With the upcoming super-cala-whimisical-fantasia of sports arriving by feeding-tube the next few days – we are going to bring you lightning round editions of the DiRT Canon – as there is too much work with all the playoff games for the NBA and NHL, baseball, The ‘Tucky Derby and some sorta superbowly-fight…stay tuned

1. Won’t someone think of the players… For the first time in baseball history a game will be played in front of, no one…It finally answers the question if a bear sh*# in the…no, it’s if a tree falls…or is it if a Oriole game broke out and no one was there to see it…I don’t remember.  In all it’s weirdness, it could be made into a drinking game, example: drink every time you hear someone say surreal, or weird, or empty, etc…We know the “why” and it gives off an eerie feeling like a storm is coming – the likes we haven’t seen in this country, since the summers of ’68/’69.

2. Just the tip… The Clippers are not disciplined enough to beat the Spurs and would someone please drug test Tim Duncan right now – I’ll have what he’s having.  I saw him make plays and ballet around the court last night in a way, that I didn’t think he had it in him anymore.  That block on Blake Griffith in the 4th, then strip him of the ball was classic!  The Lion of Oz needed courage and the Clippers can’t find the yellow-brick road with metal detector.  Need proof?  Missing 16 free-shots from the charity stripe is the difference the game – maybe the series – and when one of your best players, who looked unstoppable, disappears in the 4th Qtr, you’re done – O Blake where art thou.  Instead the Clippers are down 3-2 in the series and head back to the Alamo to be treated like Davy Crockett.

archie-bradley-face

3. I’m fine…it’s fine…s’fine…This is what 115mph of cork+cowhide looks like when it hits your face.  As Archie Bradley of Arizona found out last night when the ball Carlos Gonzales hit, struck Bradley in the mug.  No word yet on how bad the damage may be – but the sound was terrifying, heard all the way, deep down in the DiRT Canon Bunker – like when firewood pops at a campsite.  It wasn’t enough to stop Kyle Kendrick serving meatballs however – he was serving them all night, as the D-Bags won 12-5 over the Rockies.

4. The stars at night…In the worst kept secret in all of sports – Adrian Peterson just wanted to remind people, again, how great it wold be if he could play for Dallas.  Peterson wants it.  Jer-ruh wants it.  In a vortex of irony, the Vikes should rob the Cowboys in a Shakespearean reversal of the Herschel Walker trade.  If anyone needs help piecing together the particulars, I’m available – also for children’s parties.

5. Revenge is a dish best served cold, but Dan Uggla will take warm too…In all to classic Atlanta fashion, the Braves choked a 9-1 lead to lose to the Nationals on Uggla’s 3-run bomb, 13-12.  Uggla went 3-5 with 5 RBI, all while still generating a paycheck for most of his salary from the Braves – they cut him earlier.  It’s just another long-line of stories of Atlanta being burned and last night was just another chapter.

6. All a Twitter…In other news of irony – yesterday Twitter (TWTR) was all set to report their quarterly earnings after the bell rang on the Stock Market.  Word is, it was because the report was to be underwhelming.  The twist is, a software company found the report and released it an hour early – social media wins again!  As you’d expect, Twitter lost 18% of it’s value before trading closed – upended by their very own Frankenstein monster.  It’s like ray-ee-ain, on your wedding day…

DiRT Poor

Never noticed how much Ryan Leaf looks like Matt Ryan

It has been said that the NFL stands for (N)ot (F)or (L)ong – so I thought we could look at the biggest (NFL)’s by each team, list is compiled by Charlie Campbell.  Be careful, these busts could bring up past feelings of hurt and woe…Let me know if I missed anyone – what are your thoughts?

AFC NORTH

Baltimore Ravens: Kyle Boller (Cal) – 19th-Overall Pick, 2003
This pick didn’t hurt as bad because the Ravens took Terrell Suggs a few picks earlier. But as good as Suggs has been, it doesn’t change the fact that Boller was a bust. The Ravens gave him every opportunity to be the starter, but he couldn’t get the job done and was only a backup-caliber player. The painful part of the Boller pick was it wasted some great years from a Baltimore defense that had Hall of Famers in their prime and may have won more championships with a quality quarterback.

Cleveland Browns: Brady Quinn (ND) – 22nd-Overall Pick, 2007
There were a lot of options to pick from like Courtney Brown and Tim Couch, but Brown had his career ruined by injuries while Couch had a bad team around him. Honestly, Couch’s career numbers aren’t that bad. Quinn on the other hand, started only 12 games in three years. He was inaccurate in college, but that was ignored by Cleveland, and he completed less than 54 percent of his passes as a pro. Quinn threw 10 touchdowns as a Brown and was overmatched in the NFL. Considering the Browns gave up a lot to move up for him, Quinn is the worst draft pick in Cleveland’s history.

Cincinnati Bengals: Akili Smith (Oregon) – 3rd-Overall Pick, 1999
The Bengals took a 1-year wonder in Smith, and he went on to have a 3-14 record as a starter for Cincinnati. Smith completed only 47 percent of his passes with five touchdowns and 13 interceptions. Across four years, he appeared in 22 games before the Bengals cut him and he never got a shot with another teams. Cincinnati passed on some great players like Edgerrin James, Torry Holt, Champ Bailey and Jevon Kearse when it took Smith. Smith was taken instead of Daunte Culpepper, so the Bengals had a mistake in their quarterback evaluation as well.

Pittsburgh Steelers: Tim Worley (UGA) – 7th-Overall Pick, 1989
Worley was billed to be a great back out of Georgia ready to be a Herschel Walker-type player in the NFL. However, Worley only lasted four years with the Steelers and never could average four yards per carry in any season where he had a significant amount of carries. Worley also had a huge fumble in the 1989 playoffs. He was a painful top-10 pick who was a huge bust for the Steelers.

AFC SOUTH

Houston Texans: Travis Johnson (FSU) – 16th-Overall Pick, 2005
This was a tough call between Johnson and Okoye, but Okoye has managed to stick in the league even though he became a journeyman. Johnson started 38 games in four years and had only two sacks for the Texans. He ended being given away to the Chargers and didn’t turn his career around in San Diego. The Texans don’t have a long draft history, but Johnson stands out as their worse pick.

Indianapolis Colts: Jeff George (Illinois) – 1st-Overall Pick, 1990
You could argue that John Elway should be this pick. He refused to play for the Colts and forced a trade to Denver, but Elway was still a great choice considering the kind of player he became. George (the first Jay Cutler) was also a first-overall pick, but he had a terrible run with the Colts. It also hurt that Indianapolis traded away Andre Rison and Chris Hinton, two Pro Bowlers, to move up for George. The Colts lost a lot of games with George at quarterback. This deal set the franchise back a few years.

Jacksonville Jaguars: Blaine Gabbert (Mizzou) – 10th-Overall Pick, 2011
The Jaguars don’t have a great draft history, but Gabbert was a painful draft pick who will impact Jacksonville for a 10-year stretch. The reason is J.J. Watt went one pick later to the Texans. Gabbert was an awful quarterback. As one source said coaching Gabbert, “I don’t know how to coach a player to have physical courage.” Gabbert was afraid of being hit and that led to terrible quarterback play. He also blamed his teammates for his own shortcomings and was dubbed ‘Blame’ Gabbert in the Jacksonville locker room. To make matters even worse, the Jaguars traded from No. 16 to No. 10 and dealt a second-day pick to take Gabbert.  He now plays for San Francisco and will probably start for ol-what’s-his-name.

Tennessee Titans: Adam ‘Pacman’ Jones (WV) – 6th-Overall Pick, 2005
The Titans ignored the character concerns that were apparent with Jones before the draft and took the troubled cornerback anyway. He played well early in his career with the Titans before his off-the-field issues destroyed the promise he once had in his career. Jones earned a year-long suspension from the NFL and lasted only two seasons in Tennessee before the organization cut its losses and sent him packing.  He has become decent for Cincinnati, with no issues that we know of.

AFC EAST

Buffalo Bills: Mike Williams (Texas) – 4th-Overall Pick, 2002
Williams was a mega bust in Buffalo in large part because of a poor work ethic. He was moved around from right tackle to left tackle to guard and defensive tackle. Williams had the starting left tackle job taken from him by an undrafted player in Jason Peters. To make matters worse, 2002 was a strong draft in which the Bills passed on the likes of Bryant McKinnie, Quinton Jammer, Dwight Freeney, John Henderson and Albert Haynesworth for Williams. Taking Williams instead of Mount McKinnie was a huge error in player evaluation.

Miami Dolphins: Ted Ginn Jr. (OhioSt) – 9th-Overall Pick, 2007
The Dolphins were wise to pass on Brady Quinn, but taking a poor receiver and only a returner with a top-10 pick was terrible decision-making. It was a painful pick as Ginn was taken instead of some studs like Patrick Willis, Marshawn Lynch and Darrelle Revis. Ginn didn’t last long in Miami before becoming a journeyman. The drafting of Ginn did lead to one of the most hilarious quotes in recent draft history when then Dolphins coach Cam Cameron said the team was not only getting Ginn, but they were getting his family as well. Ginn and his family didn’t prevent the Dolphins from landing the No. 1 overall pick in 2008 and almost going winless in 2007.

New England Patriots: Ken Sims (Texas) – 1st-Overall Pick, 1982
Sims never lived up to the hype and was known as a player who wouldn’t practice. That earned him the nickname of “Game Day” because he said that is when he would show up. However, Sims collected only 17 sacks in his career and missed a lot of games. He was taken a few picks ahead of Jim McMahon, who beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl a few years later. TNew England also passed on Marcus Allen and Mike Munchak in the top 10 for Sims.

New York Jets: Kyle Brady (PaSt) – 9th-Overall Pick, 1995
The Jets provide the problem of a lot of options to choose from including Vernon Gholston, Roger Vick(RB-TexAM) and Mike Nugent. However, Brady is the worst pick in franchise history. With the fans in New York chanting for Warren Sapp to be the pick, the Jets passed on the future Hall of Famer for a blocking tight end with the ninth pick. New York already had a good tight end on the roster in Johnny Mitchell, so this pick was stupid in so many different ways.

AFC WEST

Denver Broncos: Tommy Maddox (UCLA) – 25th-Overall Pick, 1992
This pick made zero sense. The Broncos had John Elway in the prime of his great Hall of Fame career, yet spent a first-round pick on a backup quarterback. Maddox was a bust in the NFL before rehabbing a year in the XFL and then having some success as the quarterback for the Steelers. Maddox wasn’t a bad player, but this has to be one of the most questionable first-rounders in NFL draft history.  This was more about the arrogance of Dan Reeves telling Elway who runs this team by not drafting the WR Elway wanted.

Kansas City Chiefs: Todd Blackledge (PaSt) – 7th-Overall Pick, 1983
Blackledge was the dud of the 1983 NFL Draft’s famed quarterback class. The Chiefs took him instead of Jim Kelly or Dan Marino, who went later to the Bills and Dolphins respectively. Even lesser quarterbacks like Tony Eason and Ken O’Brien had some success for their teams. Blackledge never put together success for the Chiefs, and the quarterbacks they passed on for him made it even more painful. Taking Blackledge was the worst pick in franchise history.  But has become the best announcer in the QB class of ’83 – which is nice.

Oakland Raiders: JaMarcus Russell (LSU) – 1st-Overall Pick, 2007
This was an easy choice. Russell was viewed to be a future superstar with his huge size and one of the strongest arms to come into the NFL this century – except for those that saw him play regularly in college, calling him peanut-head. He was a disaster from the get-go as he had a rookie holdout that started the quick tailspin of his career. Russell got overweight and out of shape, plus demonstrated a poor work ethic. He also had a problem with codeine-infused cough syrup. In 31 starts, Russell completed 52 percent of his passes with 18 touchdowns and 23 interceptions. He didn’t take his NFL career seriously and was unable to get another shot with another team after the Raiders conceded he was a lost cause. Considering a couple potential Hall of Famers went right after Russell in Calvin Johnson and Joe Thomas, Russell is easily the worst pick in franchise history. The Raiders also passed on Darrelle Revis, Adrian Peterson, Marshawn Lynch and Patrick Willis with that pick.

San Diego Chargers: Ryan Leaf (Wazzu) – 2nd-Overall Pick, 1998
After playing well in his first two games, Leaf became perhaps the most epic bust in NFL history. He threw interceptions consistently and was unable to handle being a professional athlete. Leaf went through screaming matches with general manager Bobby Beathard and blew up at a reporter to such a degree that the clip is, to this day, shown regularly on NFL Network. Leaf threw 36 interceptions with only 14 touchdown passes over 21 starts while completing only 48 percent of his passes. The pick of Leaf is easily the biggest bust in San Diego’s draft history.  It also wouldn’t be the only time Ryan Leaf and bust would be written in the same sentence.

NFC NORTH

Chicago Bears: Curtis Enis (PaSt) – 5th-Overall Pick, 1998
Ryan Leaf wasn’t the only mega bust of 1998. Andre Wadsworth and Grant Wistrom were also major disappointments. The Bears took Enis in the top 10, and he was a massive miss for Chicago. It was a terrible evaluation as Fred Taylor was taken a few picks later by the Jaguars. Enis didn’t have the speed to be an effective back in the NFL, and injuries put him on the sideline a lot as well. He only lasted three seasons with Chicago and was a mega bust for the Bears.

Detroit Lions: Joey Harrington (Oregon) – 3rd-Overall Pick, 2002
There are a lot to pick from here including Mike Williams(usc), Charles Rogers(MichSt), Andre Ware(Houston) and Reggie Rogers(UW), but Harrington stands out because he was a huge bust and a mega reach at the time. The Lions forced the pick of Harrington, who was completely overmatched in the NFL. Not only was he ineffective on the field, sources say that Harrington was a terrible teammate and hated in the Detroit locker room. Harrington ended the coaching career of Steve Mariucci as the Detroit brass forced Harrington on Mariucci.  It could also be said that the hiring of Mariucci is included, #overrated.

Green Bay Packers: Tony Mandarich (MichSt) – 2nd-Overall Pick, 1989
This was an easy choice. Mandarich was a mega bust for the Packers as the steroid freak never lived up to his billing. He was an ineffective blocker after being labelled as one of the best offensive line prospects ever. To make matters even more painful, Green Bay took Mandarich instead of Barry Sanders, Derrick Thomas or Deion Sanders. This is one of the biggest draft busts, and one of the worst picks, in the history of the NFL when you consider the Packers passed on three Hall of Famers.

Minnesota Vikings: Troy Williamson (SCar) – 7th-Overall Pick, 2005
The Vikings traded away Randy Moss in his prime and replaced him with Williamson. He was massive disappointment as he only played three seasons for Minnesota. Williamson notched only three touchdowns with the Vikings and didn’t have a single season of 40 receptions or 500 yards. He barely played in two seasons with the Jaguars before he was out of the NFL. The Vikings compounded the Moss mistake by trading a second-day pick for him when he was clearly on the decline. Having Williamson go bust helped lead to that second mistake.

NFC SOUTH

Atlanta Falcons: Jamaal Anderson (Arkansas) – 8th-Overall Pick, 2007
Falcons then general manager Rich McKay made an awful selection of Anderson, and that helped lead to McKay being “demoted” to just team president and losing control of shaping the Atlanta roster. Anderson was terrible in his time as a Falcon and completely ineffective. A few picks after Anderson was picked, Atlanta saw Patrick Willias, Marshawn Lynch and Darrelle Revis get snatched up. This was an epic failure for the Falcons, but the silver lining was it led to Thomas Dimitroff and Mike Smith taking over, and Matt Ryan to come with them.

Carolina Panthers: Rae Carruth (CU) – 27th-Overall Pick, 1997
This was a tough pick with Jason Peter (Neb) and Tim Biakabutuka (Mich). The latter dealt with injuries that robbed him of his career, but the Panthers passed on Eddie George for him. Peter just flat out stunk. Carruth though is the worst pick in franchise history because character concerns were ignored in his selection. A few years later, Carruth had his pregnant girlfriend murdered.

New Orleans Saints: Jonathan Sullivan (UGA) – 6th-Overall Pick, 2003
The Saints had two first-round picks in the 2003 NFL Draft and traded both of them to move up and select Sullivan. He was an epic bust as he had only 1.5 sacks in three seasons with New Orleans. He was given away to the Patriots, but they didn’t tolerate Sullivan long before cutting him, and he was out of the NFL within four years of being drafted. To make matters worse, the Saints passed on Vikings/Seahawks great defensive tackle Kevin Williams when they took Sullivan.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Josh Freeman (KState)- 17th-Overall Pick, 2009
This was a tough call as Eric Curry, Keith McCants, and Reidel Anthony were all huge disappointments. However, the Josh Freeman pick from 2009 unceremoniously ended a successful stretch for Tampa Bay. Since the Bucs busted on Freeman, they have gone 30-66 with zero playoff appearances. The only team worse in that stretch is the Jaguars at 29-67. Freeman had one good season in 2010 from smoke and mirrors used by offensive coordinator Greg Olson, but Freeman had accuracy issues in college that were completely ignored by general manager Mark Dominik. Those problems persisted and led to Freeman completely falling apart while throwing lots of interceptions. He also developed off-the-field problems and lost his focus on football. The pick of Freeman set the franchise back.

NFC EAST

Dallas Cowboys: Kevin Brooks (Mich) – 17th-Overall Pick, 1985
Dallas wanted to take Jerry Rice with the pick used on Brooks, but the 49ers traded up and beat them to the punch. That made the Brooks pick especially painful as Rice is one of the greatest players in the history of the NFL while Brooks had 12.5 sacks in four seasons with the Cowboys. They dropped him, and he didn’t do much with the Lions in two seasons.

New York Giants: Dave Brown (Duke) – 1991 Supplemental Draft 1st-Round Pick
This was a tough choice with Cedric Jones, Ron Dayne and William Joseph all being contenders. However, the Giants used a first-round pick on Brown to replace Phil Simms and Jeff Hostetler. Brown started for a few years, but he couldn’t complete 60 percent of his passes and threw more interceptions than touchdowns. The Giants moved on from him, and Brown was ineffective for the Cardinals. He is perhaps the biggest bust in the history of the New York Giants.

Philadelphia Eagles: Leroy Keyes (Purdue) – 3rd-Overall Pick, 1969
Keyes was a very painful pick. The Steelers took Joe Greene one pick later and he went on to dominate the NFL. Keyes ran for only 369 yards and three touchdowns in his NFL career. Another Hall of Famer and a half-dozen pro bowlers were selected after Keyes went off the board to the Eagles. It was a very regrettable draft for the Eagles.  Tebow will help them forget.

Washington Redskins: Desmond Howard (Mich) – 4th-Overall Pick, 1992
Howard was supposed to follow the great trio of Art Monk, Gary Clark and Ricky Sanders as the next great Redskins receiver. However, Howard was terrible as a wideout and was only useful on special teams. In three seasons with the Redskins, Howard caught just 10 passes. Washington also traded up giving away two first-rounders and a third-round pick to move from No. 6 to No. 4 and leap frog Green Bay. Howard ended up helping the Packers to win a Super Bowl after the Redskins dumped him.

NFC WEST

Arizona Cardinals: Andre Wadsworth (FSU) – 3rd-Overall Pick, 1998
Wadsworth was a great college player, but he didn’t even last four years in the NFL. To make matters worse, Charles Woodson went one pick later along with some other good players like Fred Taylor, Takeo Spikes and Tra Thomas. Wadsworth had only eight sacks in three years for the Cardinals. He isn’t remembered as much because Ryan Leaf went one pick ahead of him, but he was still a huge bust for Arizona.

San Francisco 49ers: Jim Druckenmiller (VaTech) – 26th-Overall Pick, 1997
You could consider Lance Alworth (HOF) since he signed with the Oakland Raiders of the AFL instead of San Francisco. Druckenmiller though marked the downturn of the 49ers’ dynasty. This was a pathetic first-round pick as Miller only started one game for the team and was dumped after two seasons. He was with Miami in 1999 before falling out of the NFL. Druckenmiller was supposed to replace Steve Young, but San Francisco was lucky that it signed Jeff Garcia. While Garcia didn’t win a championship, he got the 49ers to the postseason a few times and wasn’t inept like Druckenmiller.  Moral of the Story, the downturn begins again and this time it’s for real.

Seattle Seahawks: Dan McGwire (SDSU) – 16th-Overall Pick, 1991
This was a tough call between McGwire and Aaron Curry, but quarterback busts are always more painful. Those epic missteps also can lead to series of losing seasons and other desperate moves at the quarterback position. That was the case with McGwire. After he went bust, the Seahawks had another one in Rick Mirer while trying to replace McGwire. McGwire only threw two touchdowns, six interceptions and 745 yards in his NFL career. He only lasted four seasons in Seattle with only five starts.

St. Louis Rams: Lawrence Phillips (Neb) – 6th-Overall Pick, 1996
Phillips was supposed to be the feature player for Dick Vermeil’s St. Louis resurgence, but Phillips was a mega bust on and off the field. He ran for just over 630 yards in back-to-back seasons before the Rams admitted that he was a sunk cost and got rid of him. Phillips flamed out in Miami and San Francisco before his off-the-field problems landed him in prison. Phillips’ horrible character was evident at Nebraska but the Rams drafted him anyway. There was no excuse to take him, and the organization should have known better.  He is the yardstick that all red-flags are measured, or at least should be.

Monday Dreg

Kevin Love Says Kelly Olynyk Injured His Shoulder On Purpose 

1. Love lost between two teams?…

Movies have sure lied to us over the years about what to do with a dislocated shoulder – I always thought that you just slammed it back in and resumed ninja-chopping bad-guys – apparently for Kevin Love, it doesn’t work like that and I demand an investigation.

If you witnessed this game from the grassy knoll, then you saw what was at least, white-on-white-violence of a nonsense play from Kelly Olynyk in the first quarter – to, at worst, a full blown conspiracy with intent to dislocate – judge for yourself.  Intent seems to be the word the Cavaliers are using as Jae Crowder seemed to take the brunt of Cleveland’s backlash.  First, by JR Smith exhibiting a flagrant backhand that saw him ejected – then, secondly, Perkins giving him a cross-check – not ejected.  Olynyk owes that dude some beers for all that abuse – since he was held out of the game until the 4th, to avoid personal retaliation.

So for Cleveland their first series sweep is, more bitter than sweet, it’s bittersweet.  JR Smith is lost to a one-game suspension, and Kevin Love, who clearly never watched any Lethal Weapon movies, could be out two weeks.  That could be a huge difference if the Cavaliers have to face the Bulls before their trip to the Eastern Conference Finals – they will.  But before everyone got a trophy for participating, the NBA was a lot tougher – Hollywood never lied to us then and our basketball players were really given something to cry about – just ask Michael Jordan when he played Boston, New York, Detroit, etc…


 

Austin Rivers Plays The Game Of His Life, Clips-Spurs Tied At Two

2. To be the champ, you got to BEAT the Champ…

When you’re down to the defending champions and YOU NEED a “W”, you can’t just turn to anyone.  You got to find the guy on your bench you know, someone who has been thru it, WITH YOU, the highs AND the lows.  It’s time we make way and give the coaches’ kid the respect they deserve.  Thank You, Austin Rivers!  Thank you for your ability to play horribly for three years to finally getting a chance to play horribly on a good team that your Dad happens to coach – the odds were against you, but you pulled it off, somehow.

Austin saved his best game of his career to save the Clippers and tie the series with the Spurs.  In 17 minutes, Austin Rivers scored 16 points off the bench from a team that has none, to help them win, 114-105.  It is not often you say, out-loud, that Austin Rivers was the third best guard on the floor and you may never say it again.  Austin only missed one shot and it might be unfair to expect this level of performance – but if you are a fan of variance then, then this is your poster child and to him we salute you, under-achiever.


 

3. …No One Here Gets Out Alive…

This is a matchup that was hampered by injuries going in – the Trail Blazers without Wes Matthews and Arron Afflalo was out for two games – seems to be getting worse. The Grizzlies lost point guard Mike Conley in the third quarter after he took an elbow to the face from C.J. McCollum.

Other people that have seen time on the M*A*S*H* list include Portland backup center Chris Kaman and Memphis backup point guard Beno Udrih.  Injuries may mean more to these teams, than any other in the conference – because it appears that Memphis and Portland pushed in all their chips in the beginning of the season to make a deep run in the playoffs – only to be blown up, for falling short.

Marc Gasol, LaMarcus Aldridge and Jeff Green all have options to become free agents at the end and so the question begins with Aldridge.  Does he leave Portland because of an early exit sweep?  Does Gasol come back?  Next up for the Grizz would be the Warriors and they’ll need Conley healthy to have any chance.  At full strength this matchup, could have been a great one – instead it is  just another chapter of two teams that are good, but have yet to find whatever it is, to take that next step and time is running out for both.


4. So you’re telling me there’s a chance…

Is this the start of a series or just delaying the inevitable?  Last night the Mavericks chose to play this lineup for 18 minutes: JJ Barea, Al-Farouq Aminu, Monta Ellis, Tyson Chandler and Dirk and it paid off.  Of course, it doesn’t hurt that Dwight Howard couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat, going 3-13 from the line.

Finally it looked like the Mavericks were the hungrier team, doing the little things that limited the Rockets’ advantage from the bench.  So we have to ask ourselves – is this the Rockets taking a game off to clinch it at home, or a trend that extends?  The last thing the Rockets want is Dallas to have hope – we’ll know within the first 5 minutes, if this series is over and all hope is lost for Dallas.


 

5. Heroes of the Dorm

This is ESPN’s Sharknado!  If you just so happened to watch ESPN 2 last night, this is what you saw.  You were watching people play a video game, that is not even out yet, for a chance to win free tuition for the rest of your time in school – as long as you aren’t Tommy Boy.  This Multi-Online-Battle-Arena also had announcers and as you also might expect also had a reaction – all over the Twitter.

Now in case you forgot, ESPN stands for Entertainment and Sports Programming Network and for a network that has provided you quality programming like: watching guys play poker, watching guys eat lots of hot dogs, or watching guys play scrabble, then how is this not the next step of evolution?  It’s the First Letter!  Some people whined that this is the cause of ‘Murica‘s obesity problem, playing video games – like sitting on your a$$ watching sports somehow contributes less?  Think of it more like the evolution of competitive chess.

I think the problem is not so much the nerd-fiefdom – the war is over, geeks have won – it’s for a game no one knows about and isn’t out yet (June 2nd) – making it a brilliant marketing ploy on a night that no one watches ESPN 2 anyway – check the numbers.  If they had made it Halo, Call of Duty or Mario Kart -you likely would have had more of a positive response.  In a world where the biggest movies are from comic books, should we not be surprised it has taken this long to get video games on TV?  Everywhere else but here, these shows are huge hits – it makes sense for ESPN 2 to promote this, and break twitter – just like Sharknado did – it’s so bad it’s good – BTW, ASU’s Dream Team suffers brutal loss to California in Heroes of the Dorm championship

ESPN Airs Video Games, Twitter Freaks Out

ESPN Airs Video Games, Twitter Freaks Out

Dishin’ DiRT

This game was bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!  If you turned this game off when the Warriors were down 20 in the 4th, then shame on you – because we might be watching a season of legendary proportions with this smiling assassin, Steph Curry.  He salsas, he drains threes and each week does something that has us forgetting that basketball was ever played before him – it has, I’m just slathering hyperbole like extra-mayonnaise on a sandwich.  Just think about what we watched for a second last night, with under 6 minutes left, the Pelicans had a 99.8% probability of winning by INPREDICTABLE.

The Pelicans dominated the #1 seed, as if they had switched places for the first 42 minutes.  In the first three quarters, Anthony Davis was 10-17 with 13 rebounds and all night the wings for the Pelicans lived in the paint or had wide open shots – New Orleans made Norris Cole look like an all star last night – it was that kind of domination, for 42 minutes.  This is why the Warriors likely will win the West, there is no substitute for this kind of offensive explosion at any time and cold-blooded-ness.

You must consider the Warriors motivation; instead of giving the game away down 17 early in the 4th – as most coaches would have done – Steve Kerr put Steph Curry back into the game.  Probably because Ryan Anderson hit a few shots and talked trash to the bench.  From then on Draymond Green and the rest of the Warriors grabbed 10 offensive rebounds – Green 4 of them – repeatedly beat the Pelicans to the glass – making up for their poor shooting.  The biggest of the 10 was the last one.  But before that, look at the 3 Steph made to give the Warriors a shot at OT:

In every other instance with how games are ref’d in the NBA, how is that not a foul on Curry?!  That and-1, could have sealed it for the Warriors and no overtime – Curry gets crushed after the shot.  But to back up a bit – how do the Pelicans not foul before Curry shoots the ball – either the one that got them to within two – or the last one BEFORE he gets the ball?  Of course Monty Williams, the Pelicans HC, said he told his players to foul, they just didn’t execute his plan – but let’s be serious – Monty Williams has trouble telling anyone anything – anyone hear if he had a problem with the crowd tonight be too loud and illegal?

What should concern Monty more is, where was Davis in the 4th and especially in OT?  A talented kid like that, has to stop starting strong and tiring late.  If he ever wants to be a serious contender, he’s got to something other than what he has been doing.  Someone like Davis and that skill-set should dominate for all four quarters, not just 3 – remember he had 13 rebounds in 3 qtrs, only got two more the rest of the night.

So what did we learn?  We learned that coming back from 20 is a dubious distinction – no other team can give you that kind of magic, and yet it leaves you wondering how the best team puts itself in that position.  The Warriors have yet to play a full 48 minutes and as the playoffs go on, other teams will not make the same noob mistakes as the Pelicans have.  As a fan though, do we care?


 

On April 12th, this was Yordano Ventura having some words with the Millville Meteor after a line drive single, that Trout later scored on.  Yordano never thanked Catcher Salvador Perez for saving his life, thus keeping his Napoleon complex in tact – because on his next start he started another brawl with the Athletics for throwing at Brett Lawrie.  Ventura was not suspended, only fined, and so was available for his third start last night against the White Sox when he ignited this melee:

Five players were ejected: Ventura, Edinson Volquez, Lorenzo Cain, Chris Sale and Jeff Samardzija.  I love the spunk Yordano has, but when your first three starts empty the benches, you have to wonder if it’s you – it is.  For the Royals, we get it – no one took you seriously and you’re out to prove last year was no fluke – April hasn’t finished yet and you guys are acting like a bunch of Jersey Shore goomba’s who feel slighted because someone is making fun of your uneven-spray-tan and height – like: what did more damage, SuperStorm Sandy or your fake tan and chlamydia, what, are you still upset your mom had to buy two car seats when she drove you to the store?  If we are going to assign blame, than it goes all the way back to 1973, and the Designated Hitter.  Ventura would have less Macho-Man if he had to swing a bat.  Or maybe it’s revenge for this in 2002, after-all it is the Chicago way.


 

Some strange facts for the 2015 season:

  • It is the first time ever that a team that won the World Series (SF Giants) had a 7 game losing streak in April and the team that lost the World Series (KC Royals) had a 7 game winning streak in April.
  • When the RedSox and the Yankees played a 19 inning game, it was the longest ever for the RedSox – but it was also the first time that a team had won (Yankees) after blowing multiple leads after the 15th inning.
  • Bernie Williams retires today after not playing since 2006 – he never filed the paperwork.  After hearing about that Paul O’Neil also announced his retirement, after not playing since 2001 – same reason.
  • Trevor Bauer (Indians) is the only man in a 100 years to start a season of 9 innings of hitless baseball and not throw a no hitter.
  • Every game Tampa Bay has played this year, the team that scored first, won the game.
  • Last Tuesday the A’s became the first team to win shutouts in 4 of their first 9 games since 1910!  Then on Wednesday, the Tigers became the first team to do it since Tuesday.

 

April 26th, 1995 – was the first official game at Coors Field (’94 strike being the reason for the late start) and was a 14 inning gem that saw the Rockies beat the Mets, 11-9, on Dante Bichette’s game winning HR – starting the magic that would continue that season, earning the first wild-card, post-season berth.  The Rockies would lose to the Braves 3-1 in their first playoff appearance.  But that Opening Day was a long cold one that was phenomenal to witness.  Besides my memories of that game and of that moment, I still have the ticket from that day, signed by Pete Coors – how cool is that.  It is also the moment I asked the man upstairs to make sure that every Opening Day from then on is at least 60 degrees and partly sunny.  That ’95 team was something special – Walker, Gallaraga, Burks, Castilla, Bichette, Leskanic, etc…and that Home Run was the beginning of the Blake Street Bombers – we’ve had other memories since – but this was the beginning of the love affair.  Here’s a look back…

Wednesday Dregs

It’s time to Kick out the Jams…truth is beauty and beauty is truth…it shall set you free

The Toronto Raptors lost more than a basketball game last night.  They lost their soul and their future, along with any chance in the Eastern Conference playoffs and much of their already wavering self-esteem.  Anybody who can’t beat the Washington Wizards in a money game at the end of the season is a silly bet to go anywhere in the brutal NBA playoffs.  They are either playing possum or coming apart at the seams, like the Mavericks.  Take your pick.

I may have missed the memo somewhere, but anyone see this kid LeBron play?  He seems pretty good.  Last night he had 30 points, 9 rebounds, 7 assists, 2 blocks, helped some old lady cross the street during halftime, wrote a rough outline for a framework of a possible nuclear deal with Iran after the game, and finds himself up 2-0 on the Celtics.  The Celtics could probably beat 5 other teams in the East – but that’s none of my business.  It’s funny how the season plays out – in the beginning, people were freaking out about how terrible Cleveland was – they lost to the Knicks on Opening Night – the Knicks.  It wasn’t until they made some deals, some with the devil and some with other teams, only to find themselves in the position they find themselves in now – Best in the East.  Sure Atlanta might have something to say about that down the road, but Atlanta plays similar to Toronto when it comes to money-games – think if Peyton Manning played point guard for your local five – way more heartbreak than rings.

I’d say the time has come for James Harden to finally get a chance to shine for more than one series and possibly run the table.  I say that with the same certainty that I feel when I tell you that the Rockies will avoid being swept at home by the Padres, and that Tulo will be in purple the life of his contract.  Take my word for it.  I know things.


With the Stanley Cup Playoffs, NBA Playoffs and Tuesday-night StrikeZone action being watched yesterday, was their some NFL news?  I ask because, twitter was abuzz with NFL players talking smack about some kind of schedule – I assume it wasn’t the new drug schedule – see for yourself – beware, there are some grammatical errors:


That is first round pick from Purdue Kevin Plawecki, who made his MLB debut, with two hits last night.  Word is Travis D’Arnaud is feeling a lot better and is ahead of schedule.  But what about these Mets?  They are now 11-3 and have won 9 straight, with David Wright having normal body tweaks.  Niese pitched 7 shutout innings last night against the Braves and he is only the 4th starter.  Think about it.  The Amazin’s, have Jacob DeGrom, Matt Harvey and Bartolo Colon, who are 8-1 with WHIP’s of 1.14, 1.00 and .80.  Offensive health might still be the issue for them, but if….

Last night around the diamond, was an explosion of HR’s – there were 23 in the first 2 hours.  Hell, there was 2 Grand-Slams in back-to-back innings by the Reds in Milwaukee, and Encarnacion’s second home run went so far that it hit a car in the parking lot after reaching the 5th deck in Toronto.  According to my sources, those are the facts!  With all the mayhem on the basepaths, including the Rockies blowing another lead at home, there was some beef and no one wanted a pork-chop.  Prior to Bautista’s 7th inning HR, Orioles pitcher Garcia threw behind him – way behind him – that of course did not sit well with Bautista who jacked one, admired it, did a bat-flip and slow trotted around the bases, letting every Oriole know.  So in between innings Adam Jones and Jose Bautista kept the conversation going.  The Blue Jays went on to win the game 13-6, both teams are 7-7 and being in the same division, sure makes tonight’s game more interesting – of course you still might wanna take stack some guys for your DraftKings lineup – as long as there is not a brawl – because someone is taking one in the ribs.

A lot of stories early on in this young baseball season, with an added sous saint of bad-blood spilling over.


So Bryan Price fails to pull out his thesaurus during an interview and everyone loses their minds.  All day anyone could talk about was Bryan Price’s use of naughty language.  When does the faux-outrage end?  24/7 you can watch murder, abuse, violence, even sexual situations, non-stop in the news cycle all over our bandwidth.  But mention any of the “7 words you cant say on TV” and you are in a sheep load of trouble, facing a prison sentence for being unpatriotic.  Don’t believe me?  The Today show opened their program one morning with the murder of a black man by a South Carolina police officer – Just what you want – you and your kids getting ready for school – eating your fruity-pebbles and the Today show, shows a man being murdered, on TV, by a police officer.  No sanctions, no fines – but if Matt Lauer started off your day with a “motherfucker”, he’d be off the air for 6 months and might never find employment again.  South Park poked fun at the establishment when they made an entire movie, making fun of the MPAA for being hypocrites when it comes to movie-ratings over violence and language – but say the F*word to often and your movie could be banned – they actually have a guide with how many F*words can be said for a PG-13 movie – it’s twice, unless it is deemed justifiable by the context or manner in which they are used, and approved by a 2/3 majority.

Other media outlets (CNN) showed the video on a loop, while other pundits blathered on about the problems in this country – but when it comes to reading quotes from people – it’s bleeped out – or words are replaced with “fudge” and giggles.  The point is, how is a manager’s juvenile rant about how clueless he is, in relation to what his job is and why that information is relevant, was an all day event.  Who’s the guy in the media who felt it was appropriate to shame the guy, when it was just a few of them together, doing their usual sport-talk-thing, that managers have to do – is that reporting?

Has journalism subsided to shock and awe entertainment?  Remember the journalistic titans Hard Copy, The National Enquirer, Jerry Springer?  Remember when the Media was above that?  It seems they have become what they used to despise – and it seems to many people want their information salaciously sprinkled with items that pacify them from the real problems, in short  140 character bursts.  Yellow journalism has always been around us, but does anyone care anymore if Upton Sinclair has something to say about the problems with our food?  Just because it gets clicks, does not make it news.  Just because you can, does not mean you should – Jameis.  Leave the snark and snippets of informational musings to the professional muck-rakers – In God We Trust on the dollar bill, congratulations sucker, good kill.  Of course that’s my opinion, I could be wrong, M’Kay.

…Let there be DiRT

Ball 1

To some, the story goes…In the beginning the Lord created the Heavens and the Earth…and said let there be light, and there was, and it was good…then he decided to create Tebow and made him a QB and it was, meh.  Tim is maybe, one of the greatest college football quarterbacks, based on results, that constantly willed his team to victory, more than his talent.  In the record books, Tim has one-less playoff victory with the Denver Broncos than does Peyton Williams Manning.  That’s were the legend was born for most non-football fans that follow his exploits like methed-out Grateful Dead fans – except instead of a dead-head-sticker on their Cadillac, they were their love around their necks.  We all have a friend or two, that adore this man like no other – someone who would sacrifice an entire Fantasy Football draft/season to give him a roster spot, just to say, they drafted Tim Tebow.  No denying, Tim moves the needle.

But beyond all that, the man himself is what you would want your son(s) to grow up like – if all that you could accomplish as a parent, was raise a son like Tim, you would be proud.  As you should be, but that’s were it ends, because Tim believes himself to be a quarterback – an NFL quarterback – in a league that exposes your flaws faster than a runway model does after eating a cheeseburger 4 months ago.  Any other profession outside of sports would likely succeed with Tim at the helm – but not as an NFL QB.  He requires to much beyond his actual ability; he needs a similar offense to the one he ran in college, or a coach that would risk everything to defy NFL convention and actually build a team to run that offense. The NFL is never easy on mavericks, or coaches who are all hat and no cattle – Bill Walsh and Jimmy Johnson types do not come around often.

But if you found that guy who could challenge the good ol-boy, same-as-it-ever-was standards, then wouldn’t Tim be the perfect fit, with Chip Kelly as the coach?  This off-season, Chip Kelly has already created an industry of fans parroting “what’s up with that?“, with a side of, huh?  Chip Kelly’s offense is designed to challenge you sideline-to-sideline, and ironically that is Tebow’s strength too.  You must wonder the risk Chip is taking, with back-to-back 10-6 seasons, bringing the circus to town for a guy that is a great person, but just hasn’t shown great NFL QB skills.  If ever there was a perfect match however, this might be it – it certainly is Tim’s last shot – the quintessential spread QB in the quintessential spread offense, that does not require a PHD in reading defenses.  Or maybe it’s nothing more than a ploy to quiet the Philly fans from having Sam Bradford.  Sort of like the George Bush Sr strategy of having Dan Quayle as your vice president – no one will ever think about assassinating George if Dan is the next guy up.

It moves the needle, it is an interesting dynamic that leaves you to wonder, what might happen.  It either anoints Chip as a genius or another snake-oil salesman from the college ranks.  The future of NFL offensive coordinators depends on Chip’s success – he has already showed the value of tempo to the league.  Spread concepts have been around for awhile, just not to Chip’s degree.  But with Sanchez, Bradford, Barkley and now Tebow, you wonder how it all takes shape and this is what the NFL does – keeps you talking about it, (I expect Bradford to be traded on game-day).  That is why I think this is nothing more than collusion between the Eagles and Hizzoner.  Because what better way to redirect the darkness of serial killers, and abusers than to bathe the entire league in the guiding light of Tim Tebow – the penultimate distraction.  His goodness, his wholesomeness is all encompassing and it will become the league manifesto – retiring the “No More” campaign because it’s the Tebow show.  Get your NFL prescriptions ready and go comatose, baby – Tebow will be with us, and also with you – in Tebow’s name, we’ll watch.


Ball 2

Remember this day?  If you read this site, you know what we thought about the Jon Lester signing and how it was money well-over spent.  It’s early still, but there’s enough data to have cause for concern on the Cubs‘ $150m investment.  In the 3 games Lester has started, (he is 0-2) the Cubs have only won one game, and Lester has given up 12 runs, with 6.89 ERA.  It’s early but it has prompted the announcement of support from the manager that he, and the organization are behind Lester – even if the team that plays behind him are giving him the honest truth as Catcher David Ross has said – sugar-free-honesty.

The Cubs were looking for the Lester that led Boston to the World Series in 2013 – but two years removed, is a lifetime for a pitcher who also suffered a “dead-arm” in spring training.  The point being is that the Cubs (over)paid for an Ace, on the other-side of 30 and a trade with Lester is handcuffed by that contract.  So the Cubs hope that Lester does find more consistency and goes longer in the game without high pitch counts, as he said, he feels like he is doing.  Either way, Lester will be nothing more than a expensive #3 starter and as the years go by, no better than a #5.  None of that will matter if the Cubs ever win a World Series.


Ball 3

If you have not met him, say hello to Mookie Betts!  He was a second baseman in a logjam for the Red Sox, with Pedroia and young-future-cuban-star Yoan Moncada, waiting in the wings – so he moved to centerfield.  All he has done with his chance is go off.  Take last week as an example, Mookie robbed Bryce Harper of a homerun, stole two-bases in one play and hit a 3-run homerun, all in the first two innings!  Mookie is 22 and ironically only 9 days older than Bryce Harper – however, it seems the game is having a renaissance of young talent in the game – it’s now up to Major League Baseball to promote all of these guys – not just Trout and Harper, etc…If you get a chance, watch.


Ball 4…take your base

Jay Hart, a failed professional soccer player who plays in the English semi-pro league, has been fired for putting the club in disrepute.  Only in soccer could a player be fired for celebrating a bit too much on Ladies night.  Now that doesn’t seem like much, until you consider that after a few drinks, and after Clitheroe (not making that name up) lost the match 4-1 – did he believe he was hidden away in the other team’s dugout, still wearing his jersey, while having coitus-interuptus with a fan.  Yup, as you see in the picture – this dude was caught having sex with a fan in the dugout of the other team after a loss, on ladies night.  You could say that the reason he could not crack the professional level is because of his decision making skills – not just the act itself but the selection of hand positions and choice of booty being #HighlyQuestionable.  Only in Europe.