Bucket O’DiRT

You gotta feel for Shady McCoy being done DiRTy like that, being sent to football’s wasteland to play for Rex Ryan.  Overnight the Eagles traded Lesean McCoy and although we talked about that happening, we believed Chip was going to take a different player from Oregon – instead of moving up to take Mariota, he got Kiko Alonso.

So Buffalo gets a Pro Bowl RB in his 7th season – to a team that has no real QB – expected to be a work-horse in a system that he may not be designed to handle.  Shady is not a rex-ryan-run-heavy type of running back, and this now signals the end for CJ Spiller, and although he has to look for a job – Im sure he revels in getting out.

Philly improves their defense with a known commodity that is coming off of knee surgery – and now turns their RB duties to Chris Polk.  It seems Chip is tipping his hand by his preference for Pac-12 guys – especially guys he coached at Oregon.

Shady is a fan favorite in a town that is brutal on its home teams.  So Chip better have a plan, because his street-cred is gonna run out real fast in the city of (not-so) brotherly love.


#CastBeadleInSharknado

Back in 2013, the recent-twitter-cult-classic Sharknado debuted and was watched by more than 1.4m people – only to be watched again by 1.9m people during the replay – creating a cultural virus.  The Twitter-verse exploded again with Sharknado 2 and now brace yourself for the 3rd installment – a pontoon of D-lister celebrities.

The story this time is just as insipid as the last ones – starring Mark Cuban as the POTUS and right-wing-ball-bag Ann Coulter as his Veep – (I have $100 on her being eaten by #LeftShark) – the Sharknado blows thru DC, making its way down the Eastern Seaboard to the genitals of the country – Florida – #MuricasDick.

Ian Ziering is back as “Fin” Shepherd, as is Tara Reid as April Wexler.  This much anticipated installment will also feature Jerry Springer and former babe, Bo Derek.  The 2nd movie took only 18 days to make, so regardless of the production strike that recently occurred – they still have plenty of time to get it done for the summer.  So grab some friends, some beers and get your twitter account ready for the greatest B-movie franchise of all time – this is spectacular cheez.


change the name – change the name

Speaking of Sharknadoes…FINALLY, the Brian Shaw era is over after a Mike Shanahan-esque coaching job – taking a team from 57 wins, to chanting in the huddle “#6weeks“!  Do we get enough information on the guy and his ability to coach?  Was it a rocky relationship with Ty Lawson and his confrontations in the locker room?  Was it the lack of basketball concepts and offensive imagination that saw blow out after blow out at home and no improvement offensively from Faried after a big contract?  Maybe, but lets not lay this pig all on Shaw.

This solely lies on ownership for first firing the “coach of the year”, George Karl – to then hire a first-timer who had all the buzz.  Second, for remaking the team in your own mis-managed-image-of-disfunction.  Kinda like burning my house down and then getting mad at my reaction – you can’t take the effect and make it the cause.  #WhiteStripes.

It all is symbol-istic nonsense – the season is still lost – the players do not care, and no Captain-seat-filler is gonna take tropical destinations off the minds of the players.  The No-Guts are still an abomination to watch and we should all congratulate ownership for retreating back into the NBA Dark-Ages again in Colorado basketball.


Further adventures in atmospheric danger….

An Australian man posting under the name Nomadic Adrenaline has uploaded this incredible video of the moment he suffered a seizure during a sky dive.

“Possibly the scariest moment of my life,” wrote the poster.

The man, called Christopher, said his near-death experience happened during a jump last year, when he was doing stage five of his Accelerated Free Fall programme.

“At around 9000ft I have a seizure while attempting a left hand turn.

“I then spend the next 30 seconds in free fall unconscious.”

Noticing something was wrong, Christopher’s jumpmaster soon came to the rescue. The video, which appears to be filmed from the jumpmaster’s headcam, shows him approaching the unconscious man and reaching for his ripcord.

“Thankfully my jumpmaster manages to pull my ripcord at around 4000ft,” wrote Christopher. “I become conscious at 3000 ft and land safely back to the ground.”

Skydive

courtesy of The Telegraph


Fitty is laying down a lot of scratch on Mayweather when he fights Pacquiao May 2nd – saying further that Floyd is gonna smoke Manny, which is odd considering the tumultuous past shared between Curtis and Floyd.  Here’s hopin’ the $1.6m he’s throwin down isn’t needed for any retirement of part of some investment strategy because if throwing a baseball is any indication Curtis – you may not know sports – and should just stick to poppin’ bottles – #ThugLife.


When you are paying all those guys to go 0-10 against a pitching machine – it’s hard to pay one of your prospects – minor league catcher+1st baseman Jake Hernandez – more than a cup of coffee at Starbucks.  Hernandez, who signed with the Yankees as undrafted free-agent out of USC last summer – might wanna get a better agent than mom and next time go to a real baseball school.


Jordan Leopold's Daughter Asks Wild To Trade For Her Dad In Letter

I love how heart-felt this was and how smart the little girl is to call out the Wild and say they need Defensemen, a position her Dad just happens to play.  Considering the Wild and the Bluejackets made the trade – I’d say she is on her way up the ladder as Minnesota’s next GM.  It’s an awesome story – of course it could turn daddy’s little girl into a raging harpy who feels people should always do what she says – maybe it’s a sign of the apocalypse…

…in closing

The Rockies' Jordan Lyles will make a Cactus League start on Monday. (Jeff Gross, Getty Images)

Jordan Lyles

Jordan Lyles starts off today at 1:10p MST for the Cactus League Opener against the Diamondbacks at Salt River Fields.  Jhoulys Chacin is scheduled to pitch Thursday against the snakes, Kyle Kendrick on friday against the Angels at Tempe Diablo Stadium and Jorge Diva-Rosa on Saturday against the Cubs at Salt River.

 Hope springs enternal…


maninironmask‘The Man in the Iron Mask’ – the ‘Must-Haves‘, the ‘Sleepers‘ and those that might find themselves on the trainers table for your FanDuel NBA-delights each night.  We will post these DiRTy plays, everyday by 1p MST – so check back in the afternoon.  ‘Click’ the picture for the days’ DiRTy plays.